So lastnight I got the dreaded call, a call I have been going back and forth on for months now...For those of you who don't know, when I very first found out I was pregnant Dr. Williams (whom I work for at The Plastic Surgery Group as his surgery coordinator) asked me what my plans were after the baby was born. Granted, this was literally 3 days AFTER I found out I was pregnant, I hadn't seen my ob/gyn yet!!! So, Matt and I had discussed before I got pregnant I would go back to work 20 hours/week. So, when Dr. Williams asked me this I told him I wanted to work part time. At the time he said that was fine, we would work something out, possibly even have me work from home. This topic came up several times throughout my pregnancy and each time it was the same conversation. So, I was pretty certain I would come back and work for Dr. Williams part time, possibly job share with someone. Well, 6 weeks before my due date I had a meeting with Dr. Willliams and Julie Gander (the "office manager")...Crystal knows why "office manager" is in quotations :) Anyway, so in this meeting Julie had me say in front of her and Dr. Williams I wanted to work part time, Dr. Williams looked me in the eye and said "I really need someone who is able to work for me full time" basically telling me, sorry I have lied to you the past nine months, I can't let you work for me part time. At the time I was VERY angry, he told me my entire pregnancy we would work something out, then out of the blue you tell me I won't have a job to come back to! I called my sister crying, told Matt what was going on etc...my sister told me that all things happen for a reason and there is a reason behind this madness, I just couldn't see it yet...It all finally sunk in and I was ok with it all. I worked my last few weeks and every so often Dr. Williams would say to me "I am trying to work something out" At this point I was over it and didn't want to come back to work!
So fast forward a few weeks, I have Olivia and I have been home day in and day out with hardly any adult interaction. I keep thinking to myself how much I miss working and I became envious of the lady who replaced me. I keep thinking "She doesn't know Dr. Williams and doesn't know how to take care of him" Or I think she is taking care of the patients I have built relationships with the past 4 years and it has bothered me! Well, I finally got over it and now know my "full time job" is taking care of my precious little one. Then it happened, I received a phone call from Dr. Williams lastnight asking me if I want to come back to work for him 16 hours a week. In a way I was gloating, in the back of my mind I thought "HA! I knew the new girl wouldn't be able to handle him" Apparently she is WAAAY behind on a lot of things, including being a week behind on returning her phone calls!!! I ALWAYS had my phone calls returned the same day!!!! Of course Dr. Williams would never admit that this girl doesn't know what to do so he says things have gotten EXTREMELY busy and his surgery schedule is filling up way in advance blah, blah, blah. Basically he wants me to work Monday mornings, all day Tuesdays and Thursday afternoons. I wouldn't make as much as I was, but it would be decent. He said he will call me Sunday to discuss things further, but I don't know if I am ready for this. I got off the phone and started crying. The thought of leaving my baby makes me sick to my stomach. Granted, we would work something out with my dad to watch her (he's self employed) but I want to be with her ALL the time! 16 hours a week is not much, but when I look at things as far as what if I miss something major like when she rolls over for the first time or laughs the first time I want to be the one to see it, not have my dad tell me about it. Matt said not to stress and worry about it right now, we will talk more once I talk with Dr. Williams again. So, I am asking everyone who is reading my post to PLEASE pray for me. Help me make the right decision, help us see eye to eye on the situation. My hearts desire is to stay with my baby, but Matt wants a little extra income as a "cushion". Please Lord, talk to his heart and help him see I need to stay with our baby girl.
6 comments:
Carebear, I will definitely pray for you! I think it is a bad idea to go back to work there! That place is a high stress environment and they will tell you one thing and do another! They say they want you for 16 hours but I guarantee that 16 will turn into 30! That place will drive you crazy! You know that! They drive everyone crazy! I say tell Dr. W No and wait until Lil O is a year or so old and then look for a different part time job if you want. I will pray very hard for you! Love ya!
Carrie, i do not have time to write a lot but I wanted you to know that my heart feels like it is breaking for you. Please know that I will pray so much for you as I am cleaning.
Oh I am so sorry. I feel so bad for you. I will pray that everything thing works out for you. I know it will. I can't imagine living my baby but at least she would be with your dad if you have too. It won't come to that. You will be in my prayers.
carrie, i think this is one of those things that you really need to think about. I say that because a cushion is nice and you have the best case senerio where you KNOW and LOVE the person taking care of her AND it is only 16 hours a week.
On the other hand, you could miss something. Even if you do not go back to work, Olivia needs to eb around other people so she would be getting that 16 hours a week.
I think if you know for sure that you DO NOT want to go back, you should stand your ground...period. I think you should just really think about it first.
I am praying a lot for you.
Thank you all so much for the prayers, I will let you know what happens.
I'll give you my two cents, and you can do whatever you want with it. I worked 16-20 hours a week (part time) before my boys were born. When I went back to work, my aunt (who is wonderful) watched the boys. I have always wanted to stay home with the boys full time, but it wasn't financially feasible at the time. We are working toward that now. I really like my job most of the time and love my co-workers. They pay for my coninuing education too, which is nice. I also make good money for only being there 2 days a week and they give me 2 weeks vacation. I just wanted to give you some basic background info, so you'd know where I was coming from.
I did have all those thoughts about what if they roll over the first time w/o me being there, etc. My aunt even asked me if I wanted her to tell me if they did or if I wanted to wait and see it for myself. I ended up coming to the realization that the "first" time didn't matter so much as the fact that they did it and that they were progressing normally and healthy. In the end, I don't remember one single thing that they did for her first or that I missed. There was a time that one of them did something for Tim (my husband)first and I can't remember if I was away or in the other room.
There are really hectic days at home that I can't wait to go to work the next day. And there are wonderful days at home (and boys begging me to stay home) that rip my heart out about going to work.
The best advice I can give is to first pray about it, talk to your husband about it, and write out all the pros and cons of staying home and going to work. Then see where you stand. You also have to consider budget and lifestyle changes that may have to be made.
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